Normal sexual development in preschoolers
The question and answer and case study categories in this blog will help you when answering your 3-5 year-old’s questions. By age four to five most children will:
- Be conscious of how their body functions and how it appears to others
- Ask where babies come from and how they were born
- Play games like doctor, ‘examining’ their playmates bodies
- Have erections or vaginal lubrication
- Touch their genitals for pleasure
- Know their own gender and be able to recognize males and females
- Begin to recognise traditional male and female gender roles
At this age children have difficulty understanding abstract concepts. When answering their questions use language they are familar with and give basic factual information. This will help them feel more positive and confident, and you will be laying the foundation for open honest communication.
As they learn and grow, young children constantly repeat activities and questions. In the early years you have many opportunities to give your child an understanding of the role sexuality plays in our lives. They learn about sexuality from observing you. They observe how you relate to others, how you express loving feelings, how you respect other peoples’ differences including different values.
If you want your child to come to you for support when they are teenagers you need to start developing good communication when they are little. A comfortable pattern of communication will be established between you and your child – one that can extend into the teen years.
